A satirical farce in the spirit of the comic Captain Underpants
“Sooie!” yelled Lizardberg from the perch of his treehouse overlooking the mud pit on the Kauai compound. Little Sami had just wrestled a wild boar to the ground and pinned it. It was one of five tasks Sami was assigned on the smartphone Gig worker app ObeyRabbit to earn the reward 1000 likes on the social media FakeLifeGram, including Lizardberg himself and his foundation LizardBro Initiative.
You may be asking yourself, how could Sami be so lucky to be a personal gig worker for a billionaire oligarch? The reason is that OpenHub went better than Sami could have ever imagined. A different billionaire, who ironically was also pretending to save the world, Bill Gump had brokered a deal with FakeAGI to steal OpenHub data at scale in a way Sami could never have imagined. They marketed OpenHub to many Meme Thrashers working in the University system as a “free tool for education”. This legitimized the service, fooling many critical thinkers into participating. Fake philanthropy from Bill Gump was also “wind at their back” of getting the professors to trust OpenHub.
The reward for helping the Stealsi get one step further to billionaire totalitarianism was a permanent-ish temp job on ObeyRabbit. Lizardberg was one of the main employers on this elite app, and after Sami got to know him a bit better, he even told him, just call me “Lizard Boss”. It is what all my minions that obey call me. Sami was ecstatic and quite hopeful of working toward his father’s goal of enslaving humanity to billionaires.